I Won’t Forget

It was a beautiful day much like today. Temperature was around 70 and school had just started again after a long summer break.  I had just finished an exercise video and was about to start the treadmill when I turned on the tv.  Instead of the regular programming the station was showing a view of the World Trade Center which was expelling billowing, dark gray smoke. 
 
I called Himself at work to see what the buzz was there since he was in the travel industry.  They thought it was a small plane gone astray just as one did at the Empire State Building many years ago.  While we were talking, a second plane went into the other Tower and I screamed, "OhmyGod!  OhmyGod!  OhmyGod!  It was then we knew we were being attacked.
 
After hanging up with Himself, I tried to go on the treadmill.  Was it shock?  A need for normalcy or routine in my world which had just been turned upside down?  I can’t tell you but I remember that I couldn’t stay on that machine but, instead, sat riveted to the television.
 
I called my sister and gave her office the lowdown.  I called my parents, brother, friends and told those who hadn’t heard yet to put on their tv’s.  What channel, they asked.  Any channel.
 
Thinking about bioterrorism, I went to the nearest supermarket and bought twenty-two gallons of water and two gallons of bleach for purifying water.  I then filled up my gas tank and told the Arab attendant to be careful.  Next was a stop at my dd’s home.  She was a mess but I knew that her friends were on their way so I went to The Boy’s school.
 
The Boy was in the lunch room and I explained to him and his friends what was happening as calmly as possible.  They didn’t seem spooked so I asked my boy if he wanted to stay in school and be brave for his friends.  He said yes.  As I was leaving, I stopped in at the nurse’s office.  I told her I didn’t know what was the right thing to do.  She told me that, yes, I did know.  I immediately went back to the lunch room and took my son home.
 
Himself was not permitted to leave work until three that afternoon.  We had to turn off the television despite the fact that I didn’t want to.  It just wasn’t good for our boy to watch this over and over again.
 
Living close to a very busy airport we are quite used to hearing planes going overhead at any time of the day.  One of the most eerie parts of that day was the silence of commuter jet traffic and the roar of military jets and the pulsing of helicopter rotors which occasionally swept by. 
 
We had no idea what was to come next.  All we knew was that we were together, God was and is alive and well and that His eye was/is on us. 
 
Truth be told, I don’t remember much else about that day.  I was helping to care for a friend who was dying of cancer and had to compartmentalize everything to be able to cope.  In the following months, I became anorexic (not for the first time), my son graduated from sixth grade, my dear friend died and I went into an eating disorders facility for three weeks to keep from dying myself.  However, on September 11, 2002, the trauma hit me big time.  I kept expecting the same thing to happen.  It didn’t, thankfully, but the PTSD Alien Hunter speaks of was and, I believe, is still rampant in these here parts.  
 
On this fifth anniversay, I sit here and wonder when the next attack will occur and if it will happen in the same places.  Could my son cope with watching a site in NYC smoking and burning for two months again?  I don’t care what your political leanings are but I believe this administration has strengthened our security greatly.  Our borders are still porous and that is a problem we need to deal with.  Whether or not we belong in Iraq will not be discussed on this site and I will immediately delete any posts referring to it.
 
One of my greatest fears is that we, as a nation, have become complacent.  Yes, we have to get on with our lives.  However, there are people who complain about taking off their shoes before hopping on a plane and many who no longer fly their flags like we did five years ago.  The taxis in NYC are honking their horns loudly again unlike the control they showed for what I believe was months after 9/11. 
 
One good change has remained, though.  We say, "I love you," much more freely than we did five years ago.  We are much more aware of how fragile and finite our lives are.   This is a very good thing.
 
I love you Mom.  I love you Sis. 
 
 

14 responses to “I Won’t Forget

  1. Hey,
    You will never hear me complain about having to take off my shoes… 🙂
     
    The brownies were AWESOME but needed to cook about 15 minutes longer.  My son took them out but didn’t check for done-ness.  They were a little squishy in the middle.  But YUMMY!   YAY! 
     
    Don’t let the day get you down.  Remember who runs the universe.  🙂
     
    ~R

  2. Ciao g,
    It is really great to see you stop in for a while and leave a comment on my site, thinks so much. I loved it.
    I see that you have fibromyalgia, my mom does as well, and I know all about how much she suffers with it. She has her good days and also her bad days too. I feel sorry for her, and pray for her all the time. I will keep you in my prayers as well.
    You comment on my site that you had some things that you wanted to ask me, no problem, if they seem personal, maybe you would prefer to send me an email. I dont mind at all, and will do my best to answer all your questions that you may have. Feel free.
    May God bless you on this special day, and may we all remember 9/11.
    God Bless You
    Hugs & kisses
    LoveShelley
    xXx

  3. There was no fear; just anger at the monsterous cruelty, & sadness that anyone would let ideology overcome humanity, or even the writings of their own beliefs. I know that we are closer than before, not taking any day for granted, & making time for the things & people that are important to us.  

  4. You know, Gail?  It always blesses me to see your face.  Thanks for coming to my blog and letting me see your smiling face again!
     
    I’ve been busy about my day – a typical Monday except not-so-typical.  Finally by late afternoon after everybody had gone for the day, it’s all I can do to keep from crying.  I kept trying to go find something on Fox or CNN’s web site that will be affirming about 9/11, but I realize now I’m totally looking to the wrong source.
     
    And you know, Gail, the hand of the Lord – for whatever reason – is on this country.  You mustn’t let yourself think about things like the next attack, etc.  That’s the enemy’s playground and his way in to cause fear to grip your heart.  Just think how many attempts have been thwarted since 9/11.  Who do you think is responsible?  What other explanation can there be except that God is still showing abundant mercy and grace on the United States.  We must keep focused on Jesus, who is the Savior and Light of the world.  He is the only hope for every nation, tribe, and tongue.  And we must keep praying for America and her leaders.  This is where we must keep our focus.  Jesus is the cure for every ailment – including complacency.  We must fix our eyes on Jesus and keep them fixed on Him.
     
    And know I’m preaching to myself the loudest and strongest right now…
     
    I love you!
     
    Carol 🙂

  5. Hi Gail,
    That was a horrable and scary day wasn’t it? I remember thinking, "We’re being attacked" I could hardly believe it.
    I think Paula enjoyed seeing the Statue Of Liberty and Central Park best, while she was in The City. I’m just glad she’s home safe and sound.
    Hope you have a wonderful week, may God bless you.

  6. It could be no other school but JHU in my book as it is the only school of that I know of that has violence as a topic for research.  And to think I came from a little rinky dink town in North Missouri.  Please pray for me as I begin the application process.  I thank God every day for getting me this far in life.  Without Him, I would be nowhere.  I will finish my MBA this spring and pending admission start my PhD next fall.  I had no choice but to make my site private as I knew there would be things I would want to talk about but couldn’t due to my current work.  (Because I’ll be leaving them as soon as I start the PhD.)  Anyway I’m wasting your space for something I could write in my space….sorry.  Hope you have a great week!

  7. thank you for your coming,i just a college student,the subject i learn is internationail trade and economic,so the english is very important for me,i find some foriegn friends to learn english,that’s just what i want to do!  

  8. I cannot imagine how it must have been for you people close to the trade center ….it was enough being in England and watching what seemed like horror movie and knowing it was ‘for real ‘.PTSD is an awful thing and lots of people are affected by it ,it should be taken more seriously by the medical & governments and recognised as an illness .I know ‘Sandman’is suffering badly after being in Iraq and needs prayer right now as are so many others like him .
     
    on a lighter note ,ty for Fergus’ b/day greetings ,we had a lovely tea party to celebrate .Unfortunately he has an ear infection so was not as happy as usual ,but he kept us entertained with his antics …lol standing on an empty present  box to escape from his ‘pen’ among other tricks he has 🙂
    God bless you with a peace only He can give
    sandra

  9.  Hi Gail,
      Just thought i would stop by and say hello.I hope you are doing better today.I am going to read everyone’s tribute.I am so glad that moment united families to live each day as their last!
     So sad it takes such a horrible catastrophe to do that.God Bless all the family memebers that never get to say their I love yous now.
    Well, that was a beautiful entry and I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate you and wanted to send you my Blessings and Love today!
    Charlotte

  10. P.S. I kind of like the list of things about you listed out where it’s at, rather than hidden away. Everytime I am here, I scan it and new things always jump out at me. I very rarely click on the link titled 101’s and I don’t know why. I prefer seeing it, and so often I laugh out loud and something humrous written in there. 😀

  11. Going to the airport is a hassle, but it is worth it. We have to be careful. Our world is no longer safe as we believed it was. Things have changed so much since before that happened. We, as citizens of this country, have changed. I’m not sure we’ll ever be the same.
     
    I had no idea you struggled with an eating disorder. I cannot imagine what that is like. I hope all is well now.

  12. I’m just so grateful we know the ‘end of the story’ – otherwise I would be consumed with worries abou what might happen next.
     
    My prayers are with our soldiers, our leaders, those all around the world who were affected by the actions of a few. And I pray for those who have chosen to be our enemies.
     
    I pray, too, for you and your struggles with pain.
     
    -cindy

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