Back to the Same Old Pattern?

 
I hope not.  After a week of calm and decluttering, I hope I can maintain what I have achieved and continue even further.  This is not usually a house of calm and tidiness.  From what I gather, especially from Flylady, clutter is a symptom of a greater issue. 
 
For me that issue is a feeling of not being able to control my surroundings.  I have finally realized that, no, I can not control the actions of the people around me.  However, I can control my own behaviors.  When I change my behavior, those around me often change theirs as well. 
 
Case in point:  I was shopping in my local grocery store and I stopped to ask an employee where something was.  He continued what he was doing and then asked, "What?" in not the nicest tone of voice.  I gave him one of Aimee’s patented big smiles and he couldn’t do enough for me.  When he couldn’t find the item I was asking for, he suggested another place it might be in the store (it is a very big place).  I smiled again and thanked him and was on my way.  Several aisles down, he caught up with me and told me exactly where to find the item! 
 
Same thing happened in another aisle with another employee.  I suppose they get so many complaints that a smile and a kind word makes their day!
 
What I am getting at here is that if you wait for others to change you will wait forever.  Changing your own attitude will either help them to change OR make it a heck of a lot easier for you to cope!
 
I’m not saying this is an easy thing to do.  I’ve been working at it for years!  However, with the right attitude, life is so much simpler.  With God’s grace, the process will continue.
 
When you are stressed out, what do you tend to do to cope?  Is it a healthy or not?  I tend to isolate.  It is only unhealthy if I stay that way, wallow in self-pity and don’t communicate.
 
Do you have one person in particular you talk to when you are stressed?  First, the most important person for me to chat with is God.  He is so real that He is approachable and loves me more than anyone in this world can.  Then, depending on the situation, I have several people I can contact.  If I know I am overreacting, I call L who is very laid back.  For other situations, there are other people.  I am so blessed!
 
Are you an anxiety eater?  Oh, yea. 
 
Who can make you crazier than anyone else?  Himself, of course!  Why do you think I need to change my attitude?!
 
Just for fun:  When is purple appropriate?  Just about any time!  Same with zebra print!purple zebra
 
What’s up for the weekend?  I’m not really sure here.  The weather is beautiful so there are lots of options.
 
be blessed, g
 
Ooo – I nearly forgot!  Happy Thanksgiving to my friends up north in Canada!  (thanks Linda)
 
 
 
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12 responses to “Back to the Same Old Pattern?

  1. I agree.. I can tell the difference when my house is neat, and when it isn’t.. I think it goes both ways.. it is a symptom of something else I need to deal with, and it makes me crazier!LOL I can often get people to do something for me, like the employee did for you, due to my politeness and positive attitude toward them.
     Stress.. I tend to isolate, too.. And God sometimes has to yank me up by the shorthairs!! lol And I have a couple of friends that I know well enough to share with.. YES I am a big anxiety/depression eater.. My mother can make me crazier than anyone else… And Purple is ALWAYS appropriate!!LOL
    hugs,
    Jean
     
     

  2. Woot!  Yeah that is a hard thing to learn and even harder to apply, but when you do it will make you life so much easier ~smiles~
     
    Yeah, I am a bit different, if the guy talked to me like that I would tell him to change his attitude before he makes a visit to Intensive Care Unit ~grins~.  My friend will embarrassingly attest to these acts of mine ~smiles~.  You don’t talk too me like I’m nobody…you will talk to me with respect and treat me like family ~grins~
     
    A few weeks ago this guy was in line behind me at the grocery store and he’s like, “Hey, sup?”  So I turn around to him to be cordial and he looks at me like I’m a retard and gets all snotty with me in facial expressions while pointing at his Bluetooth in his ear.  Well I pulled it out of his ear and threw it as far as I could and then asked him what he was going to do about it ~grins~.  He just cursed under his breath…it looked like several people wanted to clap ~chuckles~.
     
    If you take my spot I have been waiting for in a parking lot?  I will jump out and ask you to move, if you don’t then I will kick your ass ~grins~.
     
    Of course I am a big old ugly, mean looking biker/ruffian…it probably wouldn’t work the same for you ~chuckles~, plus you’re a good Christian woman so you don’t need to be beating people up ~chuckles~.
     
    I am a firm believe that people just need to have their ass kicked really good and then next time when they want to be a prick they will remember that pain and think twice, thereby making them nicer ~grins~
     
    When you are stressed out, what do you tend to do to cope?  Stress is a killer for me, literally…not only does it shut down my immune system but with my explosive rage disorder and PTSD it must be dealt with before it reaches a certain threshold…I use exercise, meditation and Marijuana…the combination of the 3 seems to work very good, and I prefer it over the drug pushing doctors pills ~grins~.
     
    Do you have one person in particular you talk to when you are stressed?  Yeah my wife…she is good at calming me down…I don’t dare talk to God because he just makes me more mad and stressed ~chuckles~.  Once I am stressed it is too late, so I try to nip it in the bud ~smiles~.
     
    Are you an anxiety eater?  What the hell is that? ~chuckles~.  You mean kind of like a “Sin Eater?”
     
    Who can make you crazier than anyone else?  Myself, I am the ruler of the actions that are spawned by my emotion, so no matter what anyone else does it is my lack of acceptance that makes me crazy ~smiles~.  The whole of the humanity stresses me out because they are so stupid they will just allow all this crap to go on because they are to cowardice to step up to the plate ~smiles~.
     
    When is purple appropriate? I don’t like purple, it is the color of deception and royalty ~smiles~  I do not own anything that is purple! ~smiles~
     
    I might be getting a puppy this weekend…gonna do some shopping…~smiles~

  3. When you are stressed out, what do you tend to do to cope? crawl into bed and pull the blankets over my head
    Do you have one person in particular you talk to when you are stressed? I am very fortunate that I have a number of people I can talk with. Who I choose depends on the situation
    Are you an anxiety eater? Absolutely – junk food!
    Who can make you crazier than anyone else? most of my male friends
    Just for fun: When is purple appropriate? ALWAYS
    It’s Thanksgiving this weekend here so I am going to some friends’ place for a traditional turkey dinner on Sunday. 

  4. Attitude is so important, it can make a world of difference in pretty much any situation.  It can really change our perspective on relationships and situations.And yeah, when would purple not be appropriate?  What a funny question!!

  5. i am soooo one to be the pleasant one, but recently pleasantness was getting me no where, the business person was getting testier and testier. never really encountered that before. i literally said   with wrinkled brow,"whatever" and walked away.
     
    my favorite stress chat is when i am alone in the car, to God. no one can hear me. that’s a big deal to me. i can talk outloud safely.

  6. I read somewhere, we have the greatest control over what happens…and it boils down to controlling our own attitude. 🙂
    I have lotsa clutter in my house which desperately need removal! just never feel up to it…don’t know where to start.
    how have you been? take good care G! is it winter there already? here it’s raining and storming and thundering like crazy!
     
    hugs

  7. When you are stressed out, what do you tend to do to cope? I tend to immerse myself in a good book. Lately it’s been the Concise English Dictionary – never underestimate the power of using big words to gain the advantage in a dispute. Do you have one person in particular you talk to when you are stressed?  It’s all bottled up inside – I figured if Genie can hide in a bottle, so can my stress. Let’s hope no-one opens it anytime soon…
     
    Are you an anxiety eater?  I’m a regular eater so anxiety has little to do with it – it’s just very unfortunate that the metabolism of those who copied my ways is nowhere near as fast as mine.
     
    Who can make you crazier than anyone else?  ‘She’ used to, but she’s not here anymore…. she moved back to Wasilla, Alaska where her fellow types reside. Just for fun:  When is purple appropriate? Almost never, it just doesn’t go with any of my outfits.
     
    PS: Thanks for the message on your previous blog entry; I’m not much of a writer nowadays, but I’ve now left a comment area on my blog should anyone want to leave a note…

  8. Wow, I can relate to way too much of what you are saying!  Stress eater – big time.  Clutter monsters – big time.   This house has been the worst, and I think moving in here as my little sister was dying somehow ties in…. I haven’t quite pulled it all together yet, but I am trying to figure myself out so I don’t have to stay in the bad place I’m in.

  9. I think the quote goes, "be the change you want to see in the world."Gandhi.
    I employ this tactic often.  Just look at how nurses respond to me in the hospital and you will see an example of it were.  Many of the other veterans think I am a fair-haired child, but little do they know that I have treated all of the nurses like I wanted to be treated.
    If you’re polite and have a decent smile, which to be honest my smile is definitely not my best quality, you can get quite a bit done.It’s great to be back and thank you for coming and checking on me.Billy Paul

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